Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
An incomplete summary of the book by John Gray.
- Men Are from Mars, Women Are From Venus
- Introducing the book.
- When men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom.
- Mr. Fix-It and the Home Improvement Committee
- Men mistakenly offer solutions and invalidate feelings.
- Women offer unsolicited advice and direction.
- A man’s sense of self is defined through his ability to achieve results.
- To offer a man unsolicited advice is to presume that he doesn’t know what to do or that he can’t do it on his own.
- A woman’s sense of self is defined through her feelings and the quality of her relationships.
- Generally, when a woman offers unsolicited advice or tries to help a man, she has no idea of how critical and unloving she may sound to him.
- Many times a woman just wants to share her feelings about her day and her husband, thinking he is helping, interrupts her by offering a steady flow of solutions to her problems.
- When our partner resists us it is probably because we have made a mistake in our timing or approach.
- A man wants to make improvements when he feels he is being approached as the solution to a problem rather than as the problem itself.
- Men Go to their Caves and Women Talk – How we react to stress
- Men pull away and silently think about what’s bothering them
- Women feel an instinctive need to talk about what’s bothering them
- To feel better Men go their caves to solve problems alone.
- To feel better Women get together and openly talk about their problems.
- A woman under stress is not immediately concerned with finding solutions to her problems but rather seeks relief by expressing herself and being understood.
- To forget her own painful feelings a woman may become emotionally involved in the problems of others.
- Just as a man is fulfilled through working out the intricate details of solving a problem, a woman is fulfilled through talking about the details of her problems.
- How to Motivate the Opposite Sex
- Men – motivated when they feel needed
- Women – motivated when they feel cherished
- Men – need to overcome resistance to giving love
- Women – need to overcome resistance to receiving love
- Speaking Different Languages
- Women – what to do when a man stops talking
- Men – how to listen better without becoming frustrated
- Men Are Like Rubber Bands
- Men get close but then needs to pull away
- Women – support pulling-away process
- Women Are Like Waves
- Women – sudden shifts of feeling
- Men – support by recognizing when they are needed the most without having to make sacrifices
- Discovering Our Different Emotional Needs
- Men and women give the kind of love they need and not what the opposite sex needs
- Men need trusting, accepting, appreciative love.
- Women need caring, understanding respectful love.
- 6 ways you may be turning off your partner.
- How to Avoid Arguments
- Men – by acting as if they are always right they may invalidate a woman’s feelings.
- Women – unknowingly send messages of disapproval instead of disagreement.
- Scoring Points with the Opposite Sex
- Women – every gift of love scores equally with every other gift regardless of size.
- 101 ways to score points with women are listed.
- Men – score big by giving men when they want.
- How to Communicate Difficult Feelings
- Different ways men and women hide feelings
- Love Letter technique for expressing negative feelings to your partner.
- How to Ask for Support and Get It
- Men – turned off by phrases like “could you” and “can you”
- Secrets for encouraging men to give more
- Keeping the Magic of Love Alive
- The Four seasons of love – how love changes
The Relationship Book
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